Tuesday, March 15, 2011

I Said, I'll Do It Later!

That's what I always tell the more reasonable, smarter me. "I'll do it later!" "Next week! I promise!" "I have plenty of time!" " My plane doesn't even leave for another hour! Chill!" A lot of us know these phrases, whether it comes from you, your lazy husband, your underprivileged child, or anyone else for that matter. We all know procrastination. I, myself, am very close with procrastination. We do (or don't do) everything together. Laundry, studying, going to bed, getting out of bed, call my parents, etc. I must say though, that sometimes it weighs me down. Sometimes procrastination is just to much.

I think I really want to move on. Find something else like, organization, or efficiency. Procrastination doesn't want me to move though. It uses words like, "You deserve it!", "Have fun!", "You're too stressed out to do this now." Example: You know when you've been around procrastination too long when you have this:




 Ewww! I don't have a big sink or anything, but if I did, guarantee that that's what it would look like. I also find myself, sitting on my floor next to a huge pile of clothes, smelling them to see if they're clean enough to wear again. Wanna know something funny? I started this blog almost a week ago! I've been putting it off for playing online games and watching YouTube. I think my room and my computer are in on it. Trying to keep me from doing what I'm supposed to do, that is. I only have a bedroom. No study, or living room, nothing. Just a bedroom. (This is what you get for living in a dorm, but that's another story.) You can imagine how this can make my new, found reformation to be quite difficult to achieve. My room is where I go to escape from the world and it's demands. Even my own demands. When I'm in the room, I'm not the boss; procrastination is. I need to take control though and tell procrastination that it needs to clean off it's desk by the end of the day. It can't be like this forever. Eventually it will all catch up to me again, and all I'll be thinking is, "Why didn't I do this sooner?".

Please wish me luck on this and I'll tell you how it goes...eventually.

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Wow! New Exotic Flower Just Discovered!

Isn't it beautiful?!

The Death Lily!

It was first found near the swamps of South Florida. Scientists gave it its names because of its black-like streaks that appear on its petals. It also has a foul smell that scientists think may be more potent then the stench of the Titan Arum, known as the largest and stinkiest flower in the world. Tests are still being done though.

The Titan Arum! Scary, isn't it?! 

Soooo, did I fool you guys? If so, then yay! If not, you all are a bunch of smart cookies! The first flower is fake. It is actually a regular smelling, normal color flower I took a picture of when I was walking around on my college campus! The other one is real though and thank goodness it is no where near us. This flower has been known to knock people out. (With its smell, not its petals.) It's not like it means to though. It was born that way (or grown, I guess). Poor Titan, born to repel all living things for eternity. Or maybe it likes it that way. It could be reclusive. In that case, it's the luckiest plant-life on Earth! After all, it's probably better to think positively about it's situation.

So, you may be asking why I went to all that trouble of creating a fake flower just to trick you. Well, really, I just wanted to show off this flower. I'm very proud of my work on it. I actually learned how to photo shop pictures back in high school when I first only took the class because my teacher was this young, graduate student who my entire class could not keep their eyes off of. He was extremely handsome! And he was one of those shy students, too, that got a little timid around girls. It was an all girls' school too, so there was no escaping that. I did learn a lot from him though. He even taught us how to take your parents' heads and switch them on to the opposite bodies. It was so cool! Unfortunately, all I can remember is how to change the color of parts of the picture. So here is another example of what you can do with photo shop.


Look! It's the Purple Orca and it's baby!

Actually, young child, it is the Red Orca! It only looks purple because it's under water. This species of orca is slightly smaller than the rest of its cousins and it's the only known species of whale that is poisonous. That's right! You heard me! It's poisonous, so don't go tickling this whale's tongue no matter how much it begs, because it will send you to the bottom of the ocean faster than you can yell, "Betrayal!"


 Don't touch it! It's a trap!


Ahhh, I love photo shop! It's a shame though that these living things do not exist. I find my flower to be quite beautiful and interesting, and I think the poisonous orca would really put a twist on life. While these freaks of nature do not exist; however, there has been a recent discovery of this entire habitat hosting all these never-before-seen animals. These are probably the strangest, most unique animals to have been recently found. Like there's this colorful dove:


The Fruit Dove

And a very large, but friendly, new species of rat:

The Bosavi Woolly Rat

 
And some strange black and yellow caterpillars that make themselves look like a snake:


 The Black and Yellow Noctuid Caterpillars

All these species and more were found in an old, volcano called, Mount Bosavi, located in Papua, New Guinea. It's just amazing, to me, that these creatures were hidden from us for so long. I don't know if you can tell but I'm a real sucker for things like this. If you are like me, and are thinking, 'Wow! I want to know more!" Well you can, because here is the link to the article and to the series of pictures!



Anyway, that's all that was on my mind today. I have completely emptied out my brain for you so I won't be back until it's filled again new awesomeness! Tataa!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Yummmm, Rat Smelling Thumbs Taste Good!

Okay so you've just read the title and have probably just thought, 'Okay, what the hell?!'. Well, don't worry because this will be explained in further detail. First off, nothing really interesting has happened to me today other than the fact that I croaked (can you do that?) during my recital while singing a bouncy German piece. See? Not a very eventful story. Anyway, I have, instead, decided to tell you my favorite story of when I was bitten by a very large snake.


No, bigger than that...


Nope, even larger...


Ah! Yes! The Burmese Python!


I kid you not! This is the snake that bit me. Granted, it was a little smaller than this, but then, again, so was I. Three feet to be exact. You see, as a child, being dragged around town, so my mother could could run her errands, I got bored. My mother knew this too, so every once in a while, if there was time, she'd take me to the pet store. I absolutely loved this! It was like a free mini petting zoo to me. My favorite were the ferrets. Those feisty little things! Well, it was one of those days that I got to go to the petting zoo pet store and the animals I had to visit first, were those slinky fur balls!






I think I spent a good fifteen minutes petting, grabbing, and poking the critters before I moved on to the more boring pets like the hamsters and mice (they weren't as playful). After a while of doing that, I pretty much had laid my hands on every furry creature in the building. My mother suddenly showed up behind me, with this excited expression. "Hey Amy! Would you like to see a big snake?!". 'Hells yeah!' I thought, though in more of a young child's lingo. She took me around the corner to the reptile section of the store and there, waiting for me, was a tall man with a humongous snake wrapped around his body. I couldn't believe my eyes. For a weird kid like me, this was a dream come true. The man asked, "Would you like to pet him?" I wasn't sure at first. It was sure a cool snake but it didn't look friendly or playful, but still curiosity consumed me. I looked up at my mother to see if it was okay. "Go ahead! It won't bite you." We both walked up to the snake and started feeling it's skin. Now, if you have never felt a snake's skin before, I'll tell you right now that they're not slimy like some people think. It's smooth and shiny like...well, you know, smooth and shiny things. For a first time experience, it was amazing to me. I actually do think, that for that short time, I was in love. It must have put a spell on me because I did not want to part from this amazing creature and as my mother chatted up the pet store employee, I sneaked around the man's back, following the snake's head. I wanted to show affection towards the snake as any child would a cat. I knew my cat loved it when I scratched him under the chin, so why would this python be any different.
 All animals love being scratched under the chin!

And here came my lesson for the day. As I gently stroked the snake under it's head, not even a second after, I found my thumb caught in it's mouth. Never in my life have I drawn so much attention to myself as I did that day. My mother and the employee caught on pretty quickly and started to try to pull the snake away from my hand. That snake was not going to give give up that easily though. He finally let go after a few excruciating seconds, but he was not done there. If he couldn't have a piece of me, then he would just have to settle with the next best thing. My mother. My poor poor mother (sigh). After my mother's hand was removed from the snake's mouth, another employee took me to the bathroom to clean my wound. I looked down and saw that quite a bit of blood had dripped on to my new, white sneakers. This was just not my day. My thumb was stinging like crazy, my throat was sore from screaming, and my favorite sneakers were ruined. "Stupid snake!" I whined. The man, who was helping me wash up, shook his head and said, "No it's not stupid, just blind. He's only a baby, actually. He probably confused your fingers for a rat or something, but I understand how you feel." Oh my God! It was a blind baby! It all makes sense now! It never occurred to me that the snake could smell the other animals' odors from my hand. I felt bad then, for causing such a fuss. After both my mother and I got all bandaged up, we went home and told my dad about our little adventure with the exotic animal. 


  Wait! What?

Anyway, I learned my lesson. It is not a good idea to treat any animal, you don't know, like a kitty, because sometimes, they're nothing like kitties and (even worse) they're blind.



     

Monday, February 14, 2011

Skeletons Are Gross

It has come to my attention that there is something very strange with the world. Actually, I have always known but never really gave it any thought until today. I started really thinking about it when I realized the messed up way we've been socialized. It all started when my teacher and I were talking about pasta. Strange, right? I told her about how much I love fettuccine shrimp alfredo. (The best pasta dish in the world)

I expected she would then tell me about the pasta dish she craved, but instead, she shook her head in sort of a disbelieving way. "You don't look like you've eaten a single pasta in your life." I was almost lost for words. I was having such a good time talking about the Italian restaurant I went to over the weekend. My teacher and I were already disagreeing with something completely unrelated, (apparently I'm really good at pant roles) so I thought, 'Hey! We all eat food!'. But no. This conversation didn't work either. I spent a good two minutes defending my lanky body by explaining some excuses for my disproportions. "Oh well actually, I eat a lot, even though I don't look like I do, haha, plus I do have a high metabolism!" Oh my God, I wanted to die. What was even worse was she tried to compliment me by saying I looked like I could model. Now, it wouldn't have been a big deal if she had just started with that in the first place, but saying that after suggesting that I don't eat doesn't work at all. Lots of models have eating disorders which i do not have, (unless eating an unnatural amount of cheese counts) which brings me to my point. Why on earth do people think it's wrong to say "Hey fatso! Lay off the chips!", but it's perfectly fine say, "My gosh! Do you ever eat?! You're so skinny!" Let's think about this for a moment. Someone who doesn't eat for quite a while probably wouldn't look like me but would look like this:
Hmmm. Looks dead to me but maybe she's just sleeping. Now, In case you are confused. I look like this:

See?! I have skin and energy! Some of the few things that food provides, so, yay, your question has been answered, random lady from the grocery store! I eat food! Now you are probably wondering why I'm blogging so ferociously about one little event. Well, this one has simply pushed me over the edge. While I've been polite not to say anything about people's bodies at all, everywhere I go, somebody just has to comment on my 'small physique'. When I was much younger, I used to be even thinner, (ahh my awkward stage). I worked at a small grocery store as a warehouse worker. At the time, I felt unfit cause I was so small, but I was able to do the same work as the others so there was absolutely no reason for this next event.

As I was putting up some olive oils on the shelf, a man, that came to the store often that we all knew, started walking by my area. He reached up, with no warning and pinched my arm. "Girl, you need to put some meat on those bones! Eating lots of potatoes will help!" Forget the fact that I nearly fell off my ladder; he is a grown man commenting on a fifteen year old's body. That's not rude or anything. It's not like I was going through puberty, I just desperately need 'meat on those muscles', so of course it's only natural for people to come to your rescue and prescribe potatoes.

Is this enough, Mr. Creepy?!



  Anyway, the point. People! Stop commenting on people's bodies! It's rude no matter what body type they have! We all feel insecure about our bodies, but being made to feel unhealthy really is a bummer. We are all beautiful people who deserve to feel good in their skin! Now I'm gonna eat some cookies.